About me

26 Jan 2025 10:29PM
Back then i used to write blog on Medium, but the platform is now banned in my country, so i created my own blogging platform so that i could continue that journey, I spent around a year procrastinate the idea before actually working on it. What a shame.

Feb 2025: In recent years, part of me wanted to change but the other just held on in the comfort zone, I really didn't know what to change but something was not right, or simply that life was not what i wanted deep down, maybe the things from the inside doesn't align with the the things from the outside ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ . After some loss at the end of 2024, i lost direction in my life, nothing felt like matter anymore. I currently have a lot of time and don't know what to do with it, it's not like I'm unemployed or something but i don't want to sit in one spot doing the same thing I've been doing or doom scrolling, so i started this block as the first thing in my new journey. Wish me luck! :)

April 2025: It's been 3 months now, looking back again i still feel the same thing i felt as in Jan, things were good back then but it was too comfortable, there are days where i felt like suffocate because i didn't have anything to do, eventually at the end of the day i felt like shit. I started my journey and took small steps, it felt lonely and painful, sometimes i wake up in the morning and don't know how to get through the day. There are many ups and downs these days, there are days which i felt like kings, talking to everyone i meet, but also there are days i talk to no one and feel like shit. Actually i wanted to change so bad that i didn't take the time to work my thought out and joined a Jiu Jitsu class, the last 2 months it felt like obligated, now i just want to get there. Last month, i bought a camera and really enjoyed it. Last week, i went to the gym again, i really feel like going out and pushing the weight, it clears my foggy brain like the bright sunny day.